two voices crossing / everyone hates me but nobody knows me

impostor syndrome, creative multiplicities, home and tour, and more tour

Hello all,

I started writing this almost two months ago, abandoned it, then remembered I should announce my announcements and peddle my wares - in a very casual and non-oppressive way, of course.

I am currently on tour and in my hotel in Ghent, finishing off this Substack message, searching for good coffee, and trying to keep it together after like 30 hours of compounded jet lag from Toronto to Tokyo to London to Ghent. I am very tired and still very excited about music. Though, lately, everyone has been coming for me online and it is Hurting My Feelings. I am trying to not care but it is hard when all I wanna do is my very best and it is not good enough for my friends, supposed friends, and complete strangers who either hate my music, my body, or my objectively hilarious online commentary.

All jokes aside, this is a nice little reminder to me that I don’t truly know anyone and definitely don’t know or understand the behind the scenes workings of artists and musicians I do not know personally. It is easy to critique someone from the comfort of your couch while they’re off on the other side of the world just trying to work and make their life happen. What is the Sun Kil Moon lyric?

“This business is troubling, a big nagging cyst
You get on this plane and I'll sit at your desk
And I'll leave at eight and be home by five
Call me from Warsaw if you have time”

The bolded type will be my current commentary on my meant-for-October message. Enjoy.

The two months ago message:

I am writing you from a friend’s home outside Los Angeles. I am “home” from tour for the next two and a half weeks. This break in travel is going to be packed though - cramming to meet recording deadlines, conceptualizing the beginnings of 2025 projects, and of course, planning for the next time I travel.

Lately, I have been dealing with a prolonged bout of impostor syndrome related to both my activities in and outside of what I always name “music world”.

I am touring a lot in the coming months. A short tour of Japan, a festival date in London (even if they spelled my name wrong on all the promo, yes it is me performing), and a proper European stint including shows with deep homies, heads, and friends. See you there?

-

The details (updated November 11th version)

OLD DATES

JP

Tue 29th October – Kyoto (JP) @ UrBanguild

Wed 30th October – Tokyo (JP) @ WWW

Fri 1st November – Tokyo (JP) @ Shibuya Quattro

Sun 3rd November – Shizuoka (JP) @ Festival de FRUE

UK

Sat 9th November – London (UK) Pitchfork Festival @ EartH Hackney

EU

NEW DATES

Weds 13th November – Gent (BE) @ Minard

Thurs 14th November – Aarhus (DK) @ Kunsthal Aarhus

Fri 15th November – Malmo (SE) @ Inkonst

Sat 16th November – Gothenburg (SE) @ Oceanen

Sun 17th November – Vienna (AT) @ Rhiz

Weds 20th November – Bratislava (SK) @ Nová Cvernovka

Thurs 21st November – Kosice (SK) @ Tabačka Kulturfabrik

Fri 22nd November – Bern (CH) @ Full Of Lava

San 24th November – Braga (PT) @ FENDA Festival

Announced on Tuesday, October 1st but now fully available as of November 8th: a new claire rousay LP - The Bloody Lady

The Bloody Lady marks an unexpected new chapter in Rousay's blossoming career, demonstrating her ability to apply her delicate melodic sensibility and meticulous attention to detail to the medium of film. This score becomes a deeply personal and heartfelt project, casting new light on Viktor Kubal’s more-than-40-year-old magnum opus and helping it regain the recognition it deserves.

“ The Bloody Lady is a timeless story of unfulfilled love that leads to the destruction of one’s humanity. The eternal dualism of love and hate.“ (Rastislav Steranka, Slovak Film Institute)

A list of recommendations this October (and I suppose Novemeber too):

• Jacob Wren’s new book Dry Your Tears to Perfect Your Aim

• Félicia Atkinson’s upcoming album Space As An Instrument

• Ellen Arkbro’s Moving Places show on NTS

• Trusting your gut in saying “no” (to projects, events, & people you’re not sure align with your beliefs and current interests). NOT DOING THIS FUCKED ME RECENTLY (updated November version)

Hope everyone is having an easy start to their month (november not october). I personally always feel stuck between the dark, crushing deductions in my bank account as the month’s bills are paid and the optimism that accompanies new beginnings and the blessing that is ‘a chance to start again, again’.

Today’s title comes from Francis Plagne’s song Oranges and Lil Peep’s song Fingers.

xx

claire